Day 1: Relationship Status

In my life I've had various boyfriends. I've had the jock, the bad  boy, the geek guy I pretty much used and he used me too, and the class-clown. I always figured (probably because of my parents) I would end up with a lawyer, doctor, or business guy that didn't really care about me. Knowing that my dad said it would be good for me to have a guy like that bothered me. Was I that shallow? Moving out and moving out on my own was the best thing for me and my future relationships.

I had been working at a daycare for a year before this shy quiet girl started working along side me. I hated her to begin with at work. Her accent annoyed me and she was so timid around everyone including the kids. I finally told her either suck it up or give up because she really sucked at her job. +Odette and I became fast friends after that.

She started dating this hunk of a guy. Absolutely perfect, business man, several degrees, nice groom, and was willing to crawl on the ground for Odette. I told her one day I wish he had a brother. "He does." I told her too bad it wasn't a twin though. "He is." I stood there dumbstruck. I wanted to meet him.

Second shock, I received, was that he lived in an assisted living village. I realize now I was that shallow. How could someone who was Mini Hulk's twin be in an old people's place. Odette told me to go buy cookies and we were going to visit him. I bought American Cookie Co. cookies which are my favorite and we went to the place. I figured we were going to go to a little "house" like everyone else was who was visiting was going to, however, that wasn't the case.

Odette parked outside the main building. Fear gripped me that day. I just wanted to go home and wallow in self pity. When we stepped inside the first thing I noticed was that there were a bunch of people gathered near the piano player. The guy had a gorgeous voice as he played I was mesmerized. Odette grabbed my hand as he started playing another song. I was upset because I thought we were heading toward the reception desk. Instead we were heading straight for the piano.

We finally got at an angle where I could see him and if I thought I was mesmerized before hand I was in complete shock. I remember the words he sang when he first seen Odette and I coming toward him.

Sometimes it's so hard to believe when the nights can be so long. And, faith gave me the strength and kept me holding on.You are the love of my life and I'm so glad you found me.

He finished the song and everyone clapped and clapped. He didn't look like he should have been there in an assisted living area. Minus being really skinny, he was gorgeous and healthy looking. Back then he had a beard and mustache but his playful eyes and long fingers is what captivated me. And then he smiled, and I wanted to just melt.

Odette introduced us and he automatically said "So you are the one obsessed with my brother." And pop. I honestly think that was the moment that change everything. I felt deflated. I liked this guy at first glance and it had nothing to do with him looking like his brother. My chances were gone in seconds.

I merely nodded because if I had talked I would have cried. I handed him the cookies and he looked so excited. I couldn't help but giggle at him. He talked to Odette awhile and he would ask me simple questions to keep me in the conversation. 

We left and time went on. I would see and hear from Frankie from time to time. I started learning about what was wrong with him. Finding out he had Crohn's. I began to research and research and talk to my mom, who was a pediatrician. 

Second pop to my chances was a day that Frankie was visiting and he was texting someone and he got to feeling terrible. I was scared. He turned so red and I don't believe contortionist can curl into a ball like he can when he is in pain. I found out why he had that episode was because of his ex giving him hell. I found out about his ex girlfriend who basically caused him to be stressed the whole.

Small rant: What girl bitches about her boyfriend feeling good when he is usually in the hospital, yet he builds her a house? Someone explain that to me. Who bitches at the fact he is always in the hospital because he is stressed?  Small rant over.

One day Odette disappeared because she wanted alone time. Frankie and I were in the living room talking and he started flirting and I flirted right back. At this time I had two stupid, narrow minded,  no good for anything, stupid deadbeat guys after me. I hate both of them. One thought he was a catch when really he was white trash and his brain was gibberish. The other one wasn't dumb, he just had a terrible attitude and sucked at life. 

Where those guys thought that talking to me was a way of keeping my attention in reality it made me realize I didn't want a deadbeat. I wanted someone who was fighting and living. Living with an actual purpose to life instead of whining about how crappy their lives where. I had my own issues. 

Frankie was there the last time I truly went wild with cutting. I have cut a few simple times since but nothing severe anymore. His brother was the one that saved my life that morning but Frankie was the one that changed my world after that. 

I mean he created this special note for me on Facebook. 

That was December 1, 2012 and he asked me out December 30, 2012 and I was blissfully content that trip at Disney World out on the Boardwalk. 

We started out kind of rocky because the two creeps wouldn't leave me alone until I finally stop talking to both of them. After that things really started going in our favor. I learned to take care of him and his Crohn's. We learned how to cook together. We pile up anywhere and we read together and to each other. We go shopping. Sometimes we go shopping at the consignment shops and we try on ridiculous outfits. My favorite nights are when he is feeling good and we spend hours at his piano with candle lit while he serenades me. 

We even went to Hawaii together and I swear I had never felt more in love than moment I was snuggled in his arms the sun was setting and he was reading Sand Dollar: A Story of Undying Love by Sebastian Cole while we were in a hammock. I remember I took a deep breath and he asked me if everything was alright and I started crying. He just hummed and rocked me after that. I remember my finger trailing down down his 20 inch scar where his stomach had staples in it at one time. He lifted my finger to kiss it and told me everything was fine. That was the moment I knew there was no one else.

Almost a year later after he asked me out at Disney World we were at Disney World again in the New Fantasy Land and Frankie he doesn't feel good but told me to go on. Come to find out he really wasn't feeling good but there was a huge reason why. Chris said that we had special tour of the new Beauty and the Beast Castle. And we go into the room where the library is and there is Frankie with Belle and the Beast. It still didn't dawn on me until Frankie got down on one knee what he was doing. My favorite part that hardly anyone knows beside us until now is that when he hugged me, after I said yes, he started softly singing....

I look in your eyes I'm lost inside your kiss.I think if I'd never met you bbout all the things I'd missed. Sometimes it's so hard to believe when a love can be so strong. And faith gave me the strength and kept me holding on. You are the love of my life and I'm so glad you found me. You are the love of my life. Baby put your arms around me. I guess this is how it feels when you finally find something real. My angel in the night you are my love, love of my life. 

He pulled out a cookie and gave it to me and said, "This is my last cookie from this morning." My Cookie Monster.