Fresh Start Challenge Day 30: She Leaves a Trail of Glitter Wherever She Goes

Dear Self at 15:

Life seemed hard. School, cheerleading, abuse, and not being able to drive. Trust life will get suckier next year at sixteen. Cruelty of life will play in after that. Smoking will come too and the drinking will get harder. The cutting will get worse. The cutting will get horrible. You will want to die soon.


Dear self now:

Congratulations for putting the cigarettes down, for really applying yourself to work and school. And for finding someone who loves you for you. Who doesn't care that you had a baby. Who doesn't care that you can't run a washing machine. Doesn't mind your fur babies.

You are doing so well. You are going to be married soon and have tiny ones all over and it's going to be amazing with the cookies and the glitter.


Dear Future self:

You deserve a cookie. Married 15 years now, not bad. Kids are growing like weeds and Frankie is still hanging in there. You look fantastic and still rocking the glitter I see. You are still doing marvelous things! Keep reading!

A Basket Full of Cookies

I have been terrified of this weekend.

Why you ask?

Well Frankie said we were going to talk about us having children. You see Frankie has always been unsure about having kids because of his chronic disease, Crohn's. For those who either are just plain assholes or really don't know; Chronic Disease is a long-lasting condition that can be controlled but not cured. NOT CURED! And yes that's my Frankie.

He doubts being able to being stable enough to give them the love and support they deserve. I personally think he would be the most amazing dad. For starters, he gets to be the stay at home parent who spoils them rotten with cookies and ice cream. But he doesn't see that. He thinks he would be distant because he would worry.

He fails to realize that he is amazing uncle!!!! They don't come running to him over Chris for nothing.

But this morning I was totally swept off my feet and reduced to tears.

I woke up to a box of tiny cookies. This were macadamia nut and white chocolate which is my second favorite kind of cookie! The top cookies spelled out "Eat Us." Eat them I did.

This was below the cookies. No this is not my picture this is the website's picture.

We are going to have little glittery monsters!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!